Twisting and turning
Sleepless in bed
As the night mocks past
The haunting hours
You creep by me
As I fight over darkness
Sweet memories undaunted linger
As molten dreams rain unhindered
Solace had your return been
When I rejoiced unseen
But you… was it you?
“My same you?”
You laughed, you talked
But my caresses, you recognized them not.
You were immersed in yourself
Me but some anonymous creature
You cared not to care
But you… was it you?
“My same you?”
The same eyes
The same lips, your brows
As they rose in frown
The large hands, the mole
Everything is you
But you… was it you?
“My same you?”
I am sore, I am through
Through with identifying you
It is you, my same you
The one before I lost you
I missed you
Now… it is you?
“My same you?”
But you are hers
How can you be my you?
You are you
But you are hers
You forsook me
You are hers
You are ‘you’
“But… you are not my “You”!”
Sorry for sounding so low of late. I was not well for a few days contineously, guess that took a toll on my thoughts. Thanks for staying by me. I dint know that I had so many good friends by me! Thank you very much. :)
22 comments:
Nicely done! Short phrases jumbled together to deliver a lot. Keep writing!!!
it had soooooooo much in it.. i didnt know you write soooooo well!!
u r on the right track on the success lane
chriz
I loved it diya....
especially those 2 lines which accompanied each stanza...:)
Nice lines..the pain comes across.
hw are ya now grl??
dnt feel low, alrite? maybe these insecurities in words are just gifts of imaginations.. u wud be fine.. take care..
Well written!
The YOU that we hold on to so tightly in others is sometimes not the real THEM. We paint a picture of someone the way we want, and then we get disappointed. Im speaking with experience :)
Keshi.
hi..
i loved it.. i mean it..
simply loved it
"But you… was it you?
“My same you?”
these lines r so best..
Hope u r well nw...
do tk cr...
Cheers:)
Pallav
hello, Diya!
Thank you so much for the prayers!
I am feeling way better now and can do much more things now than earlier.
Though I am still recuperating, I guess it won't harm my recovery if I resume writing poems.
I like this poetry of yours, and at some points in my life I've been through those times you've depicted here.
Hugs!
@ Brosereview
Coming from you, thats great to hear. :)
Thankxx :)
@ Pink Orchid
Ha ha, thats great to hear even.
Nevertheless Thanxx, do keep visiting :)
@ Chriz
Huh!! Ha ha, would you clarify that please? ;)
Thanxx :)
@ Anubhav
Glad that you liked it dear:)
Thanxx :)
@ IIIeen
Hey, welcome to my blog :)
Thanxx for visiting and commenting :)
Will be visiting yours soon. :)
@ Sawan
Hey, Thanx for visiting. I am better. :)
Thanxx :)
@ Keshi
Thats very true, too very you made me realize that! Itz in our world of dreams that our YOU is their and not in THEM! We just try to idealize them and get hurt.
Nevertheless, How are you dear?
Thanxx :)
@ Pallav
Thanxx for being so regular in your comments on my efforts. :)
Thanxx :)
@ Drol
Yeah, please resume... Looking forward to them :)
And did you really need to thank? Cant a friend do that for another friend? Im angry. :X
Nevertheless, glad that you are well and recovering back to health now. Hope you are well soon. :)
Thanxx :)
The other side of midnight has its own shadows
I loved the first four paras.... lovely
poignan
crisp and had pain painted.
but really i thought that the ending was abrupt and could have had more depth.
thats jus me.
and hey It my first time here. Nice blog you have. will sure visit again.
muthu
www.average-everyday.blogspot.com
@ Walker
Gotcha. Yeah, it has, and they are always painful on the other side of the shining coin.
Thanxx :)
@ Muthu
Hey, welcome to my blog. :)
Thanxx for visiting and commenting. :)
Well, glad that you liked it. But how do you suggest the ending should have been better, I would definitely like to have your take on the issue. it is just you, but indeed everyones views does matter to me. Please put them forward :)
Please do visit, I would love that. Will visit your blog soon.
Cheers :)
Thanxx :)
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